Monday, January 24, 2011

the crud

I woke up this morning feeling just like I have every morning for the past 3 days.  Like crap.  My stomach is rolling, I felt just plain awful.  So I sent emails off to my instructors and got Morgan off to school and I went back to bed.  I woke up at 12:30 and let me tell you, I feel like a different person now!  My stomach still feels a bit under the weather, but overall, I feel a lot more human.  Hopefully I can move forward now, I am so tired of feeling awful.  I miss my workouts!
I have been in a funk for the past week, I am sure that hasn't helped my overall feeling one bit.  It is amazing how you find yourself feeling low, and everything you encounter just pulls you deeper and deeper into that funk. I see now how people fall into deep depressions during the winter months.  The walls are closing in around you, everything seems to be a real pain in the butt.  I realize now how people have a difficult time sticking to New Year's Resolutions that involve improving physical activity.  It is hard to motivate yourself and keep a positive outlook on things when it is icky outside.  One small step back turns into a major leap backward.  My knee swelling up last week was the start of my spiral.  I was upset because I couldn't do the Shred- and I started feeling bad in my guts- and I just wanted to crawl in bed and not come out.  I should feel better- I did exactly that on Sunday and today!  lol  It is just finding the strength to battle the downward pull.  I even got to the point where I was questioning my decision to be in massage school.  I was ready to completely quit.  I just felt drained.  Thank goodness that I was able to get my head out of 'there' and get back into a positive, happy mindset.  I am glad that I took today off to get my head on right- and my grades will thank me as well. (I just have to remember this while I am sitting in class making up my time!!)

Today I started logging my foods- and using the Weight Watchers points system.  I know that it has probably changed and evolved dramatically since I was a part of it in 2004, however, I am using that system because it is what I know and hey, I have all that paperwork! ;)  All I have to say is thank goodness for activity points!  lol
I hope that everyone has a wonderful Monday- I wish everyone a great week that is positive and powerful!

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